The Ultimate Fighter Heavyweights Episode Recap: Weak Links

(Brendan Schaub vacuum seals Matt Mitrione’s shoulder for freshness.)

This week’s episode opens with Rashad Evans gloating about his team’s 4-0 record thus far in the competition and a training montage that ends with FIGHT! blogger Matt Mitrione wincing in pain from a tweaked shoulder. “What’s up, meathead,” Evans asks, and Mitrione replies that he needs a cortisone shot, a common remedy for inflammation in collegiate and professional football. Evans poo poos the idea but Mitrione seems to have made up his mind.

In the coaches room after practice, Evans and Mike VanArsdale joke with “Big Baby” Marcus Jones about switching teams and leaves the room convinced that he’s fighting next.

Later, “Rampage” Jackson claims that his teams losses ruin his day, his next day, and his sex life, which stings because, “I barely have a sex life as it is. I don’t need that.” Jackson predicts Zak Jensen will fight next which worries him because Jensen doesn’t appear to have much of a skill set. “If I get on my back I freak out,” Jensen says. Jackson slaps Jensen a few times and gives him a pep talk during practice and we cut to commercial.

The next scene opens with Wes Sims accusing his teammate of leaving a “family of Jensens” in the shower and threatening violence should it happen again. “I blew my nose in the shower,” Jensen says, but he denies masturbating. His housemates continue to crack on him, saying he should fess up (after all, better in the shower than in the sushi), and Brendan Schaub says, “He shouldn’t be here, let’s be honest.”

Back in the gym, Schaub Saran Wraps Mitrione’s arm down to his torso and Mitrione works out alone. He tells Evans that he’ll be ready to fight on Monday and Evans demands to know why Mitrione thinks he should, referring to him later as a “weak link.” In the coaches room, Evans, Wittman, and VanArsdale punk Mitrione and say that they aren’t going to let him quit during practice anymore.

During Team Rampage practice, Wes Shivers tips off Jackson to the Sims/Jensen situation, and then Jensen gets choked out while working with Sims. “I would have been embarassed. I would have moved to another planet,” Jackson says.

We come back from a commercial and see Mitrione playing basketball in the pool and throwing a football while his teammates express skepticism about his injury. “I just want to see Matt fight, I think it would answer a lot of questions guys are asking,” Schaub says. Mitrione looks really good while grappling and when he asks to ice his shoulder, Evans says no.

Later, Mitrione says that if his shoulder isn’t working he’ll just rip it off and replace it with someone else’s, “kinda like the old He-Man figurines,” he says. After practice Mitrione has ice bags on both shoulders. “I think he’s faking,” Evans says. At the fight announcement Evans chooses Justin Wren to take on veteran fighter Sims, which seriously pisses off Jones. “You gave me your word, man,” he says. “You said that,” says Evans, laughing.

Both Wren and Sims make fanciful underwear choices for their official weigh-in and “Rampage” claims to have never seen a group of men so excited to see two guys in their “panties.” Jackson has obviously never been to one of these before.

There’s some half-hearted hype and it’s time to do the man dance. Wren charges for a takedown and gets underhooks. Sims stomps Wren’s feet with his back against the cage, knees Wren and circles out. Wren lands an overhand, pushes Sims against the cage, takes him down, moves to side control, and gets an arm triangle. Herb Dean picks up Sims’ arm a few times to see if the fighter is still conscious and Sims finally goes to sleep. “I don’t know what the hell happened to Wes since he fought in the UFC the last time but he got choked out quick and went right to sleep,” said Dana White after the fight. Sims promised a memorable fight but this probably isn’t the way he’d like to be remembered.

For the second fight in a row, Team Rashad consoles Team Rampage’s fighter and cracks on Jackson for it., calling him selfish during a tense exchange. Team Rashad is now 5-0, Wren belly-bumps Roy Nelson, and White questions the decision-making of Team Rampage. The preview for next week shows Darrill Schoonover swelling up on Jackson and Sims stepping up his attacks on Jensen, so hopefully the secondary story lines will continue to make up for lackluster fights.

Read the recap of the first episode of The Ultimate Fighter Heavyweights.
Read the recap of the second episode of The Ultimate Fighter Heavyweights.
Read the recap of the third episode of The Ultimate Fighter Heavyweights.
Read the recap of the fourth episode of The Ultimate Fighter Heavyweights.

Abe Wagner’s wrestling needed work.
Abe Wagner’s low moments.
Abe Wagner’s talks with and about Kimbo Slice.
Abe Wagner says nobody is that gullible.

Matt Mitrione wasn’t busting his stones.
Matt Mitrione says James McSweeney kicks hard as hell.
Matt Mitrione discusses the Gospel of Roy.
Matt Mitrione’s no snitch.